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Friendships come and go. People come and go. Disappointments from these connections are inevitable. At times they will disappoint you, hurt you, take you for granted. At times it's you who is doing these things to them. We are all human. Sometimes we get caught up in our own life, our own BS, our own stuff that we overlook someone's kindness or generosity or loyalty...we take it for granted. Sometimes we leave things to be said or done "later on" or tomorrow... But can we be intuitive (or "IN-TUNE") enough to life and be able to recognize this as a sign that we are NOT living in the PRESENT? That we are not living IN and FOR the moment? I know there's a lot of talk about "living in the now" and it may sound too "Zen" like or too "granola bar" mumbo jumbo to some people. But as corny and fluffy as it may be to some, there is nothing closer to the truth. We lose track of time and in turn lose a lot of things along the way as well...like people who mean something to us, opportunities that only come knocking once--twice if we're lucky...and quite frankly, TIME. When we lose track of time, we lose just that--time. Time is the luxury we don't have forever. And there's nothing worse than reaching the end of your road and having deep regrets over things that you should have done, people you should have paid more attention to, moments you should have grasped or created. I'm not perfect...but I can say that I do love eating me some granola bars, preferably while I listen to my Buddha Bar Zen music playlist...
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For those who truly know me, I'm always on a forever quest to reach the highest level of my spirituality and version of myself. One of the nuggets of wisdom that I've come to learn is to "change our expectations to appreciation" instead. Honestly, I've struggled with the "no expectation" theory in the past, especially regarding relationships. How can one not have expectations of a thing? Is that even humanly possible? But what I've come to learn is that, in any given situation I truly feel that it's about US, not IT or THEM. It's what our own intentions are going into the situation that we must place focus on, whether it be a job, relationship, or a situation. Surely if we partake in something, naturally we are affected by how the "party" at hand interact or relate to us, thus us having an "expectation" of certain terms and/or conditions in relationship to that in return. But here's the thing... We are not in control of forces outside of ourselves. We can only go into a situation knowing what our own purpose is for it and hope for the best when it comes to what is reflected or reciprocated back to us. There had to be a certain level of trust and/or hope that we had to have had to begin with if we decided to "partake" or "proceed" into the situation in the first place, right? So my salvation lies in knowing MYSELF...and knowing myself enough to be armed with how I choose to react/respond to what comes with and out of that decision that I responsibly made for myself in the first place. Appreciation comes into the picture by simply looking at everything you experience within this situation/relationship that you've chosen to partake in as an opportunity or a "container" to enjoy living within its moments, learning more about yourself in the process (growth), and allowing yourself to express whatever it is you came into it with to share or offer nonetheless.
Like the Serenity prayer quotes: "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. Enjoying one moment at a time; accepting hardships as the pathway to peace..." |
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