So every Tuesdays, I'm blessed with 2 free movie passes. (Go Optimum!) And I try to treat myself by taking a break from my work day to take advantage of this awesomeness. (One can turn cross-eyed from designing and creating jewelry all day, you know...) As much as possible, if I know I can't spare the 2-4 hours or am only able to see one movie without an available friend, I usually head over to the movie theater to give one, if not both passes away. What baffles me every time I attempt this gesture is how people react towards me. "Hi! Do you need to buy a ticket? 'Cause I can just give you a free one if you want", I say ever so friendly, right? Well, either they automatically (and coldly, I might add) turn me away, assuming I want money for the pass(es) or they excitedly accept the offer, then go on an avid quest to somehow repay me. "Can I buy you some popcorn? A drink? Some Goobers? Twizzlers? Anything?" Sometimes, they practically drag me to the concession stand by my arm. It's too adorable! Now, don't get me wrong... I almost NEVER turn down free food. Ever. (You might as well remove "almost" from that previous sentence.) But the way I look at it, the prices they'd pay on those snacks would practically be equivalent to having have bought an actual movie ticket, right? And that would defeat the whole point of my offer. That's my theory... I know it's not a grand gesture but it does feel good inside every time I give away my passes, especially after seeing how grateful most people truly are. A little truly does go a long way... I think it's the itsy bitsy things that count. And I try my best to apply that in every aspect of my life. The smallest gesture of kindness or generosity can change the course of how someone's day begins or ends. It can act as an inspiration to "pay it forward", even when we're too troubled, exhausted, stressed, or busy in our own lives to even have the capacity or incentive to conjure up, let alone give away that kind of positive energy. I will admit though that the smell of that warm, buttered bucket of popcorn (that I could've said "yes" to) lingering around me while I sit there in that theater is almost painstakingly irresistible But I just keep my focus on that big screen...and pull out my Ziploc bag of mixed nuts and get over it. Slowly but surely. ;-)
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"I'm so proud of you." There is something so touching when someone says these words to you... It's funny because I've been thinking a lot about this for awhile now, not just recently which is when I've been hearing it more often. The ironic part is that I can't even remember who said it to me a little while ago and why. Is that bad? I've also been sleep deprived lately, so that excuses me...right? I just know that when I heard it a few weeks ago, all I can remember was the feeling that ran through my entire being from the genuiness of it. I felt every ounce of its sincerity... Perhaps that's why I can't remember the details. Is it fair to say that it transcended me to the clouds and I'm still stuck there...high like the sky? You know how something happens but you can't seem to remember anything about it except how it made you feel? ..... Sometimes we forget to pat our own backs because we get runned down by the monotony of our everyday lives. We get hypnotized by the clouds of pressures and expectations that hang over us, mostly from ourselves...that we so easily forget how the little things we do can actually be seen as inspirational, admirable, or even life changing thru someone else's eyes. Someone actually pays attention and takes the time and energy out of their own limited supply and hands you a precious gift--"I'm so proud of you." It's priceless. I know it's almost Christmas time but this gift doesn't need a holiday or a special occasion. Let's try to give it more often, like right now...which is when it matters the most.
Friendships come and go. People come and go. Disappointments from these connections are inevitable. At times they will disappoint you, hurt you, take you for granted. At times it's you who is doing these things to them. We are all human. Sometimes we get caught up in our own life, our own BS, our own stuff that we overlook someone's kindness or generosity or loyalty...we take it for granted. Sometimes we leave things to be said or done "later on" or tomorrow... But can we be intuitive (or "IN-TUNE") enough to life and be able to recognize this as a sign that we are NOT living in the PRESENT? That we are not living IN and FOR the moment? I know there's a lot of talk about "living in the now" and it may sound too "Zen" like or too "granola bar" mumbo jumbo to some people. But as corny and fluffy as it may be to some, there is nothing closer to the truth. We lose track of time and in turn lose a lot of things along the way as well...like people who mean something to us, opportunities that only come knocking once--twice if we're lucky...and quite frankly, TIME. When we lose track of time, we lose just that--time. Time is the luxury we don't have forever. And there's nothing worse than reaching the end of your road and having deep regrets over things that you should have done, people you should have paid more attention to, moments you should have grasped or created. I'm not perfect...but I can say that I do love eating me some granola bars, preferably while I listen to my Buddha Bar Zen music playlist...
For those who truly know me, I'm always on a forever quest to reach the highest level of my spirituality and version of myself. One of the nuggets of wisdom that I've come to learn is to "change our expectations to appreciation" instead. Honestly, I've struggled with the "no expectation" theory in the past, especially regarding relationships. How can one not have expectations of a thing? Is that even humanly possible? But what I've come to learn is that, in any given situation I truly feel that it's about US, not IT or THEM. It's what our own intentions are going into the situation that we must place focus on, whether it be a job, relationship, or a situation. Surely if we partake in something, naturally we are affected by how the "party" at hand interact or relate to us, thus us having an "expectation" of certain terms and/or conditions in relationship to that in return. But here's the thing... We are not in control of forces outside of ourselves. We can only go into a situation knowing what our own purpose is for it and hope for the best when it comes to what is reflected or reciprocated back to us. There had to be a certain level of trust and/or hope that we had to have had to begin with if we decided to "partake" or "proceed" into the situation in the first place, right? So my salvation lies in knowing MYSELF...and knowing myself enough to be armed with how I choose to react/respond to what comes with and out of that decision that I responsibly made for myself in the first place. Appreciation comes into the picture by simply looking at everything you experience within this situation/relationship that you've chosen to partake in as an opportunity or a "container" to enjoy living within its moments, learning more about yourself in the process (growth), and allowing yourself to express whatever it is you came into it with to share or offer nonetheless.
Like the Serenity prayer quotes: "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. Enjoying one moment at a time; accepting hardships as the pathway to peace..." |
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